Sunday, October 7, 2012

A quiet truth...

“My son is not “perfect” in the eyes of the world.” For the past few weeks this thought all to often dances across my mind whenever we are out. I see the way people look at him, and the pointing. Are they not aware that we CAN see them? We get funny questions about them like “Are they real?”… Nope just playing dress up with my 2 month old “Are those protective glasses.” Yes we are afraid your going to spit in his eyes. Or my favorite so far “Where can I get a pair of those!?!?!”
People have nice things to say as well, and I can’t blame them the kid pulls them off like a stud. Even the nice comments can be hard to stomach when your not in the mood however. It’s almost impossible for someone not to say something since its right there staring you in the face all the time, but as a parent you see so much more and you want everyone else to see it as well. He is also handsome, sweet, silly and the spitting image of his daddy!
Even more then what people see when they look at my son, I find myself struggling with what my son see’s, or doesn’t see. When I put his glasses on in the morning I get to watch his face light up and he brings out the big guns flashing smiles and squealing with delight. When I take them off of him he becomes reserved and calm, unsure of his surroundings and in constant need of cuddles (which I love). It’s a reminder that while he will be able to see, he will always be aware that he can’t see everything. My heart aches and my soul screams… “I want my son to see life the way he was meant to”
"Ahh but he is..." It's a quiet whisper; sometimes almost to quiet. It is consistent and caring, it is all knowing… And when I hear it my heart slows to a calmer rhythm and my mind once more focuses on what is true. My son was created in the image of Christ… I am in no way surprised that in this Christ continues to reveal himself to us, and call us to Him for our needs, but I am thankful He is a constant for us always. As a mother, a wife, a human I am falling short of my calling to shoulder this burden, but with His strength and grace I continue to get back up and continue on.
So you want to know what I see when I look at my son? A sweet little boy who still loves to be snuggled 95% of the time with or without glasses he is just a lover <3 A kid who can make your face hurt from smiling back at his darling little grin. A boy who already likes being dirty and screams his head off at bath time. My son who is perfect in my eyes…. And darling little glasses ;-)

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